Love, and to Not Love..

To Love n To not Love..

It seems related, yet complicated..

I find dat relationships r tiring, even though I havnt even tried..

1stly, I admit..

I do reali liked dis guy b4..

But...

I wont hav da courage to confess, if it wasnt him hu actually 'forced' me someway..

Haha..

Yep..

Relationships are nice, sweet,

yet, if it is onli 1 sided,

it brings onli sadness, hurt n pain..

I admit..

My previous blogs..

R writing bout u..

Once, a Fren warned me,

to not be so close wif him,

She say I'll get hurt,

yet I tot dis could be kept secret always,

n as time passes, da feeling wil go away..

N actually, I didnt put hope at all,

n I didnt bother to tink too much,

As I noe he has dis strong feelings towards another gal..

Which, actually was my best fren too..

I noe, to loved, is juz to hope for da best for him,

dat he may find happiness forever..

However,

I noe,

I ruined it after I accidentaly spilled it out dat day,

He asked me ques dat actually broke my heart,

N it juz causes me lots of pain..

Starting dat day,

I tried to avoid him,

to not c him,

to not tok to him...

I noe its kinda stupid,

But i dun wan him to tink too much,

N I dun wan myself to tink to much,

guess,

I juz need time to heal..

Need time to be myself again..

I seriously do hope we could stay frens forever..

No matter wat happens..

N I wished da best of luck to u n her..

Juz giv her sometime, let her tink wat she wans.....

Anyways..

Juz wanna tell..

I'm seriously ok d..

Lik a chinese song, after crying, everthing will be better..

After dat nite,

I learned a homework,

to forget da past, to work hard for future..

I stil loved u now, as a bro..

So, I do hope,

Its a new year, new beginning, n a new hope for all of us............

For now, I juz wanna love God wif all my heart,

focus in my studies,

put more effort in my ministries,

n put more time for my family n frens.. =)

*PS: For those hu read my blog, I juz wanna scribble things to release my stress, I'm perfectly ok, juz read n forget it, dun comment n dun ask me yup.. A small prayer for me will do.. Thx.. =)